


FELONY WILD WE$T VOL 2

by shakinalltheway



Category: Felony Steve - Fandom, Kurtis Conner - Fandom, Waterparks (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Western, Country & Western, M/M, Stephen King's Christine References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-03-09 14:59:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18919369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shakinalltheway/pseuds/shakinalltheway
Summary: Awsten Knight is saved by the bell, I mean, saved by our favorite felon and then shit goes wild. WILD YEE-HAW WEST, BITCH! GET READY FOR THE LOST MIXTAPE STEVE LEAVES WITH AWSTEN: FELONY WILD WE$T VOL 2. (autor note: RELEASE COWARD. NOW YOU CAN. You can change my lyrics or take them as a gift I'm rich and I don't care about money. That's actually a lie: I'm the coward you're the rich 🤠)p.s.: This follows my other story "Guilty Pleasure" where Awsten finishes inside Christine (the deadly car from Stephen King's novel).





	FELONY WILD WE$T VOL 2

"FUCK, NOT AGAIN." - I was trying to call Elijah, if someone could get me off this fuckin' car it was him.

"YO 'LIL KIDZ BOP DID YA CALL?" - I heard this voice and looked into the mirror. On the back sit Felony Steve in flash and bone. WTF WAS GOING ON?

"DUDE HOW ARE YOU HERE?!" - I yelled. True story.

"I'M ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU PAL. LEMME GET YA OUTTA HERE." - Felony made his way to the driver's seat, that I was already on.

"YO WHAT DA FUCK?" - he was almost sitting on my lap

"I need to drive this mothafucka" -the car made engine sounds. Great. He was going to get us killed. I made my way into the passengers sit. He made pleasant sounds while I was rubbing on him to get out of the seat. GOD DAMMIT, STEVE!

"TALK DIRTY TO ME, BITCH!" - he said to Christine and started to drive, we were in the middle of nowhere, the car was chill for now.

"I'm surprised we aren't dead, yet."

"Told' ya you my man, I gotcha yo back..." - he pulled over and opened the passenger's door.

"Steve, we're in the middle of nowhere..." - I said.

"Yas. She makes the rules, pal. But I think ya pretty close from that farm." - he meant Otto's farm, and I hoped he was right. Also I would never go into a car again. Might mess with one of his horses.

I got out of the car, Felony opened his window and gave me a CD.

"If I die... Release this. Give my shoes to the most expensive choir from Houston. And take my money to buy cheese. Give half to my momma."

"Uh... Okay...?"

"See ya in hell, pal!" - he accelerated the car like a maniac. Then this giant fuckin portal vortex opened in the middle of the road and FUCKIN CHRISTINE AND FELONY ENTERED IT. THE PORTAL FUCKIN CLOSED. DAMN. Otto better pick up the damn phone and get me out of here.

  
  


*******

 

_ "I HEARD HE DRIVES POSSESSED CARS" _

_ "I HEARD HE DRIVES POSSESSED HORSES" _

_ "WHAT ARE HORSES?" _

_ "YK THOSE GIANT DOGS... NEVER MIND" _

_ "I HEARD HE WAS SENTENCED TO DEATH" _

_ "I HEARD HE SENTENCED SOMEONE TO DEATH" _

_ "I HEARD HE LIVED IN THE WILD WEST" _

_ "WHAT???" _

 

(FELONY WILD WE$T VOL 2 - THE LOST MIXTAPE - TRACK 1 WHO IS FELONY STEVE?)

 

*******

 

_ "I was driving this evil red _

_ Like mothafuckin' bad _

_ Yo Felony Steve is dead (nope) _

_ Felony Steve is back (dope) _

_ Once I was in a time zone _

_ A wiggly cheesy lost home _

_ That's when I found my horse (hoe) _

_ WHAT? _

_ Felony Steve has a horse _

_ Felony Steve has a corpse _

_ Felony Steve has cheese _

_ Felony Steve lost cheese, no! _

_ All my friends are gone and Awsten is in a farm shook _

_ I can't find a phone, I can't find a home, I can't find my shoe." _

 

(TRACK 2 WANTED)

 

Harmonica sounds. Felony Steve's got a hat. Not any hat. A cowboy pink hat, because Felony Steve is fuckin' cool and pink is cool. He pushed ol' Christine down a hill. Said fuck da police. Found a white horse with flames in his tail "THAT'S WHAT I CALL A GOOD PIMP MY RIDE YO", and pursuit his new career/new mixtape as a wild felony with one goal: BE WANTED IN EVERY CITY IN THE WEST.

More harmonica sounds. Windly dust. The hottest yeehaw bae Sheriff Kurtis Conner swore the Gods he would get Steve: DEAD OR ALIVE. To bring justice to this world. He's the fastest shooter in the whole West. He is the law. His hair is sick. His Sheriff clothes are tight. He smells like cheese, which for Steve that means home. When you live in a land that you only take showers in the saturday and everything smells like shit, smell like cheese is hot.

 

_ "If I was in a coma _

_ My 'ma would keep me worm, ya _

_ I gotta brush my tooth _

_ That ain't brushes for tooth _

_ I might get golden tooth _

_ And that's the truth _

 

_ Shut up, I ain't payin' for tooth _

 

_ Steve?! Did you messed with my Netflix again?" _

 

(TRACK 5 ACTUAL MOUNTAIN)

 

Steve had just been surrounded by his own gang. They're playing poker and Steve was winning all night because he had marked the Aces. He got discovered when 3 hearts aces appeared in his hand. Steve can't count so he didn't realized he used too many cards. He threw his knife straight into one of the men's eye. Then ran out the saloon, mounted his horse and escaped in a train to Little Yee Yee.

 

Little Yee Yee was an one street town with 2 farms, one saloon, and the sheriff station. It was really small and boring, however the most handsome man aka Kurtis Conner was their sheriff. And drowning in boredom in a town with zero crimes he was ready to pursuit Steve. But don't think for a second Kurtis is a bad useless Sheriff, his father, the owner of the 2 farms/the mayor sent him to Big Yeehaw for his studies. That's how he learned to be a badass sheriff.

 

_ "I might get a train wreck _

_ Because my horse's ass cracked _

_ No I mean I'm on crack _

_ Because his ass burned the whole track _

 

_ So you're saying that your horse's tail was really made of fire and that while on the train you didn't paid for the ticket you started a fire because your horse sat there?" _

 

(TRACK 6 PAIN IN THE ARSE)

 

Kurtis never expected to be easy to catch Steve. But after that train got on fire the criminal was the only survivor and was in a pretty bad shape. He was with only one of his red boots and his shirt was gone. His half-naked slightly bronze body shouldn't mean a thing. But goddamn, Kurtis felt the excitement into his bones. As for our felon, he woke up already behind bars without his pink cowboy hat and with some random shirt on. That's when he saw him...

 

_ "I might be executed _

_ But for my mama you seduced me _

_ All the ladies might be excused _

_ Cause your curls just amused me. _

 

_ Yo, Felony Steve is in love _

_ What? _

_ I said what I said. _

_ No, you ain't Felony Steve you can't talk shit like this, bro. _

_ You're jealous because you ain't K... _

_ *trash noises*" _

 

(TRACK 7 HEART'S ON FIRE)

 

“Great to see you're ain't dead…” - Kurtis says approaching the cell.

 

“Well, I ain't easy to kill.” - Steve replies and takes his mini harmonica from his pocket, then proceeds to play it.

 

“But you will... Tomorrow at noon is your execution.” - Kurtis informs. He isn't excited about killing Steve, but sure is relieved of getting him out of his station.

 

“Let's see about that…” -Steve replies still playing the harmonica. Only Felony Steve could play so many songs in a mini harmonica with 8 notes.

 

That's when dark eyes meet green and blue. A long eye contact and silence. Kurtis starts to notice Steve's slim features and sharp jawline, his messy and lilac hair that made zero sense to him. Was he a demon or an angel? His eyes could convince and seduce anyone. His talking could easy make his way out, as it should for he's a felon. Steve on the other hand is quicker in the attraction: he belongs in no time or space, he can fuck whoever he wants to. And he sure was with blue balls since he joined the wild west. He wasn't in the mood to mess with prostitutes, and being Wanted didn't made his life any easier. Kurtis looked like an angel too, with a devilish twist, that just like Christine, would turn him on. His curly hair, the pierced nose... He knew he wasn't like the other cowboys.

 

"Y'know sheriff, I believe you have my hat..." - Steve observed raising an eyebrow. He had so much confidence in his voice that he knew he would crack the sheriff very soon.

 

"Yeet. What about it?" - he replies breaking the eye contact. Kurtis started to feel nervous about the intensity of Steve's eyes and voice.

 

"Since I am going to die tomorrow. I want my goddamn hat. And some food too. I want cheese. Hamburgers. And milk."

 

The sheriff left his prisoner talking alone. Nothing would affect him more then being ignored. However, after a couple of hours Kurtis was back, ordering Steve to get on his knees to the wall so he could open the cell and hand him his food. Steve decided to make his move, not to escape, that wasn't his interest at the moment. As a matter of fact Steve didn't knew if he could die or not. So he was dumb enough to test it. His only interest was to indulge himself before his execution.

 

"What th-" - Kurtis was about to say when Steve threw himself to him, but was completely shut by his lips. In less than a second Felony pushed the Sheriff to the bars of his sell while pressed his body against his. He could feel the pulsing erection in his tight black pants, his hands: one holding his face moving towards his curled hair and the other scanning his whole body. Steve was fast, and knew exactly what he was doing. He was unarmed, not materially but in soul. That plum haired man managed to low all his forces and make him question everything he knew about this world. He hated with pleasure. Speaking of which he started to feel a boner, that made Steve laugh in triumph. His laugh made Kurtis come back to his senses and punch the other in the face: "HOW DARE YOU?" he asked. The other kept laughing while tasting a bit of blood. He locked the sell and never returned to contact the inmate again.

 

The other day at noon in the middle of Little Yee Yee Felony Steve was tight up and ready for his execution. A few good men were gathering around to watch the death of the villain. Kurtis was late. When he finally arrived he whispered something to the executioner, and made no eye contact with Steve.

 

"Any last words?" - the executioner asked.

 

"I love you curly bastard." - he replied with a wink.

 

Shot.

 

Hysteria.

 

Harmonica sounds.

 

The fired tail horse appears.

 

Kurtis jump into the horse and grab Steve's hand so he can join it too. They ran from Yee Yee's to pursuit their love like Bonnie and Clyde. As for me, honestly, WHO THE HELL DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO TELL STEVE'S STORY? ME AND TRAVIS, DUH. I'M CURRENTLY ALIVE, AVOIDING HAUNTED CARS AND IN A BAND CALLED WATERPARKS...

 

***********

**Author's Note:**

> FYI I'm brazilian, so any mistakes, grammar, spelling etc.... Are due to the fact I had to write this fast to submit to Awsten + Travis' Slumber Party and couldn't review it properly ;)


End file.
